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To All the People along the Way

“To all the people along the way who hurt me, lied to me, betrayed me, and broke my heart…

You forced me to see the change the I needed in my life and gave the determination, motivation, and a belief that I needed to change.

You gave me more than you could ever take from me so, thank you.”

I don’t know who I am quoting…wish I did. After reading this, it made it so much easier to forgive those people because whether they intended to hurt me or not (actually it doesn’t matter what the intent was, how I perceived the message is what counts). As soon as I get over myself and really look at the situation for what it is, I realize what a great learning experience those people gave me; and the only thing it cost me was a little bit of honesty with myself and a willingness to accept that in the end, ultimately it is my choice to either become a better person from the experience, words, whatever, or to remain bitter and unforgiving. After all, forgiveness isn’t for the other person, it is to help me move on.

5 Things To Avoid


This is the only medical hypnotherpay certificate program in the state


People often wonder what is (s)he doing that I’m not  doing, or what do they know that I don’t know? How are they getting all the clients?
I don’t have all the answers, nor do I claim to, however I do have some observations and conclusions I have come to over the past 15 years of working with clients and networking with other hypnotherapists.
The first thing I have noticed is that some people are not meant to be hypnotherapists. Let’s face it folks there is a reason that I am not a brain surgeon, even though I have a great interest in the field. I don’t have the proper background. Because of all the counseling involved, just going to school to learn hypnotherapy, may not be enough, especially if there is no counseling background.
Another thing I have noticed about many hypnotherapists, is that they are often times sharing all of his/her knowledge with the client, when all theclient really wants is to get relief from the present issue, nothing more. A good therapist is able to set his/her own ego aside and let the session be about the client. Any type of talk therapist must be able to listen the client and read between the lines as to what is being said. If the therapist is talking more than the client, there is something amiss with that session.
Remember, we have two ears and one mouth for a reason.
The second thing I have realized, sadly to say, many hypnotherapist do not have enough training. Because hypnotherapy is so highly unregulated, it is possible to take a weekend class over the internet or sit in a classroom for only 100 hours an call yourself a hypnotherapist. Many of the professional organizations require their members have at least 250 – 300 classroomhours of training in addition to 15 hours of continuing education every year.
third observation I have noticed is that even though many hypnotherapists do have at least 250 (and often time more) classroom hours they were only trained in one hypnotherapeutic modality, which goes under the assumption that one size fits all. If the client has an “Ericksonian” type personality and the therapist only knows Alchemical hypnotherapy, the therapist may not be able to support that client nor even be able to recognize why the client may not be responding.
The fourth problem hypnotherapist often encounter is that they find the profession so fascinating they want to do it all (I know I did and still do). One thing I learned early on, is to become really good, specialize, in one area first. This not to say turn down someone who wants to quit smoking if you want to specialize in working with clients who stutter.
What I am saying, is work with the smoker, and focus your marketing on stuttering. Make brochures just about hypnosis and stuttering, find stuttering support groups to speak to, call Speech language Pathologists and ask to work in conjunction with them. Once you have become “the expert” about stuttering, and you are seeing as many stuttering clients a day that you want to see, move on to another field and become an “expert” in that field.
The last thing you want to avoid is marketing trap. Most new hypnotherapists, and even many experienced ones, will put a small ad online and will have one website and then will sit back and wait for it to happen. The good news with hypnotherapy is that we get clients in, we get resolution, and we get them out. The bad news with hypnotherapy is that we get client in, we get resolution and we get them out. We don’t have the luxury that conventional talk therapists have of keeping clients around for many years. We all need to be out there marketing and networking to get several lines of referrals going. Even if you are the absolute best hypnotherapist around, if you are not marketing, I would guess you are not seeing as many clients as you would like to.



So you are up on a stage in front of many dozens of people wondering why in the world you are clucking like a chicken. Because of scenarios like this, many clinical hypnotherapists scorn stage hypnosis stating that it is degrading to the profession. My personal belief is that if stage hypnosis is done in good taste, then let the good times roll. Stage hypnosis, is one of the best ways to promote hypnosis and hypnotherapy in general. Experienced stage hypnotists can keep an audience entertained with sidesplitting  laughter for hours. What better way to unwind and forget about life for a while after a brutal day at work than doing something that can be enjoyed by the entire family.  I  have seen many stage shows where at the beginning of the show the hypnotist explains that stage hypnosis is just one of the many ways hypnosis can be used, and will then go on and explain many other uses for hypnosis, such as: therapeutic, sports, painless childbirth, forensic, etc. I truly believe there is a place in this world for a good stage hypnosis show. What do you think

Online Hypnotherapist Training Classes

Over the years people have asked me if we do online classes, and my answer has always been no. I guess I am either old fashioned and/or protective of the school’s excellent reputation to risk the potential problems I see with online hypnotherapist training.

Some online schools require the student to send a dvd of a client session so it can reviewed by someone at the school. Most of the time, the client is a friend and/or family member of the student, which right off the bat is illegal in Colorado, where I live, because it is considered both a dual relationship and a conflict of interest.

My other issue with this is, if something does not go well, there is no one with any experience to help both the client and the student out. I have heard too many believable (and many more not so believable) horror stories of sessions gone wrong because of inexperience and lack of knowledge on the part of the student. By the time the dvd of the session gets to the proper people, the damage has been done and there is no one around to undo it.

I also watched one of my daughters good friends get an A in an online college course that she never even took. Another person offered to take the class for her, so the friend gave the third person all the information she needed to take the class. Granted, I don’t see someone registering for hypnotherapist training and then having someone else take the course for them, what I could see happening is someone skipping most of the preparatory work and getting right to the “how tos” and then accidently have something go really bad because the student didn’t know what he/she didn’t know.

On the other hand, I will say that I have/am seriously considering offering some online continuing education classes to people who are well trained (and can prove it) experienced hypnotherapists, because as we all know, if the session is client lead – the therapist goes where the client takes him, instead of following the therapists’ agenda – the session will never go as expected and the therapist will be able take care of whatever may come up.

What are your thoughts and beliefs around online classes for hypnotherapist training?

Just Because You Can Doesn’t Mean You Have To


Just Because You Can Doesn’t Mean You Have To

While my very near and dear friend Stella Cypher and I were cleaning up the aftermath of my basement being flooded and I was deciding what was salvageable (and what to do with it) and what was beyond  hope,  Stella made a comment just in passing that has stuck with me ever since, “Just because you can doesn’t mean you have to.”  At the time, she was referring to whether I kept something or discarded it.

It’s been almost a year since she said those simple little seven words to me and there is not a day that goes by when I don’t hear her voice in my head reminding me of them. Sometimes I’m at the grocery store debating if I really need/want a particular item. Today I was at the International New Age Trade Show looking at all kinds of stuff, both free and for sale, and several times Stella was right there in my head reminding of her wisdom.  There have even been several times I was all set to help someone out – in my mind at least – and Stella was right there screaming in my head, “Just because you can doesn’t mean you have to!”  which made me stop and think, I am really doing this to help  the other person or for myself. More often than not, I had to change my “helping” actions to “supporting” actions.

It took me a long time to realize what a huge impact those words had on my life.

So to you Stella of all the many, many reasons I have to love you like a sister, those words rank right up there.   From the bottom of my heart THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING 


What does this mean to you?

What Have you done that you didn’t have to and what was the outcome of your actions?


Pam Mills, CHt, CAC III

Director of The Denver School of Hypnotherapy

The Denver School of Hypnotherapy is approved and regulated by DPOS